Friday 1 November 2019

before cheese/after cheese


Click here to view on YouTube

before cheese



here we go again again

accidents are best designed in labs
till they are we must put up with dash
cams retirement plans & truth be told
lottery scams

earthquakes are of course another thing
chasing whirlwinds crops its share of lives
ol' Vesuvius will certainly
crumble again

when the human factor's factored in
Murphy’s Law of probability
overstates the obvious a gun
has to go off

missiles tanks & hand grenades exist
not to sit forever playing cards
slap & tickling pin-ups on the arse
nothing resists

speaking plainly like the Mafia boss
things get broken clumsy me you should
always be insured my friend play safe
double or quits



God & the right

rhubarb that lot couldn’t lace their boots
call them patriots don’t overlook
Margaret Thatcher's wartime record she
partied so much

earned a poor-show 3rd at Oxford while
aunty Frances made munitions Mum
joined the ATS & Rita wore
farm overalls

Dad was lame but volunteered twice
stranded back in France he had to walk
coast to coast to find a ship once home
switched to the Raf

workers love their country right enough
never mind your national anthems flags
marching up & down or saying prayers
voted for health

education jobs for all & not
Churchill's 2-faced iron-curtain act
earned themselves more than a coconut
God could they fight



electric swainsong

beware of geeks bearing gifs
the Trojan horse cocks its ear
click on it
wait a bit
then watch your files disappear

a ship o’fools gathers there
to whifs of great powder riffs
hamburgers
Ferris wheels
& roars of bikes over cliffs

it's just a day out for Des
who'd sooner be home on screen
surfeiting
anything
reality’s not their scene

they can’t escape password's been
erased a go-go ago
rumbles of
scrambles off
Endymion shoulda know



after cheese



undercover piece


what another god struck teen in black
head to foot who bids me move aside
almost quip she's got some cheek to ask

dressed like that I’m cool though fuming deep
down cos balanced on my toes while she's
sitting pretty mind the heaving bus

worked from dawn to dusk it’s 10 pm
ought to offer me her seat & stand
only I’d decline still got some pride

age before beauty they used to say
youthful rebels 40 years ago
didn't hide their faces wore no bras

marched against the boys & toys of war
we were at their sides of course hands off
this lot chuck themselves at gunmen's feet



ain’t no hide without a seek don’t care
what belief those robes conceal in plain
sight the game is on to take them down

civil servants fought the law against
trouser wear when skirts were de rigeur
women facing exile loss of perks

even sacking only 20 years
back one might have been her ma for that
matter half their types are from good homes

someone’s put her up to sneaking out
draped in darkest matter as if just
there to say she should be seen not heard

why go anywhere in public stay
home and be invisible she should
be ashamed of carting round those looks



say all men were rapists in her mind’s
eye just as this strange taboo implies
then I’d credit her immunity

but I don't believe we are it’s true
self control is part of growing up
older men are usually less

trouble yet for her to just declare
it like so affronts the youngsters who
don’t deserve aspersions being cast

can't she be herself without this black
mark she strikes against all men in France
home of liberty they cannot dress

up & down like so but show their clocks
maybe she's a terrorist in drag
automatic weapons under wraps



OK here's my bottom line on this
if she hadn't challenged me to move
my poor arse I'd left the girl to stew

overdressed & isolated as
suits a self obsessed regressive soul
who the hell am I to criticise

wearing skinny jeans at sixty-three
bald & pony-tailed I sport a pot
belly full of peanuts crisps & wine

piece of work of me to point a pen
I surrender shouldn't cry object
shun all judgement never carry-on

I apologise for being there
should have driven left the bus to those
bold enough to live without a care

Never again again!